10 ridiculous things people say to dentists and team members

Here are 10 ridiculous things that people say to dentists and team members:

  1. “Ugh – I could never stick my fingers in someone else’s mouth. It’s gross!”

Which is usually followed by…

  1. “…but if you don’t mind, I think I chipped a tooth. Could you take a quick look?”

Sure! I’ll be glad to give you a free, ungloved, professional opinion in public!

  1. “Why is dental school four years? Is there really that much to know?”

Of course you idiot! There are 32 teeth, and we learn eight per year!

  1. (When sitting down in the dental chair) “I just had lunch and I didn’t brush…”

Glad I’m not your proctologist….

  1. “I hate needles. I hate dentists.”

Maybe you should have thought of that when you were feasting on sugar and not brushing or flossing…

  1. “I’d rather have another baby than get this root canal!”

Just let me know what you decide so I can adjust the chair properly.

  1. “There wasn’t any pain before you did the filling, but now my tooth hurts. I knew I shouldn’t have gotten that done!”

Hey buddy – if you had some diseased tissue in your arm bone and an orthopedic surgeon drilled it out and replaced it with a synthetic material, wouldn’t you expect that to hurt for a while?

  1. “I don’t want any x-rays.”

Great! How about if I just do the entire exam with a blindfold on?

  1. “I paid for your Porsche, doc!”

No you didn’t. You paid for my extreme professional expertise, intense difficult education, huge overhead, the write-off from your cheap-ass insurance, and a zillion other things. I think a modest profit is pretty reasonable. Besides, it’s not my Porsche, it’s the lawyer’s next to us.

  1. “I guess I just have soft teeth. It runs in my family.”

Actually, a soft brain runs in your family.

Pretty amusing – but what’s the point?

Patients (and other people) say ridiculous, annoying and stupid stuff to us all day long. It goes with the territory. But it’s our job to let these types of comments roll off our backs and give our patients the very best we can offer.

So the next time someone says “Nothing personal, but I hate dentists!” – instead of saying what we would like to say (e.g. “Nothing personal buddy, but I hate assholes!”) suck it up and say something like – “Well – it’s my goal to make your treatment here as comfortable as possible!”

“Hey doc – I paid for that Mercedes!”
“Thanks – it drives beautifully!”

And so on and so on. Treat your patients respectfully at all times, no matter what they say. And maybe one day soon you’ll here this…

“You know Doc, I used to hate the dentist, but I actually enjoy coming here!!”